


Four Months

by LiveLoveLaugh



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-16
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-10-06 05:12:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10326308
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiveLoveLaugh/pseuds/LiveLoveLaugh
Summary: Andrea Shepard wakes up from a coma four months after activating the Catalyst and destroying the Reapers. Her mother fills her in on what happened while she slept.





	1. Chapter 1

They said I was in a coma for four months. Broken ribs, punctured lung, skull fracture, internal bleeding, and a host of other injuries. I wasn't paying too much attention to the doctors when they were going down the list of my injuries. After they left, I was allowed to have some visitors. My mother was first. She got promoted to Rear Admiral some time during or after the war. If anyone deserves a promotion, it's definitely her.

She told me that I was out for so long that a lot of people had given up on me. The higher ups were even considering having a memorial service. The only thing that stopped them was my mother... and him. Apparently, during the whole time I was in the coma, he didn't want to leave my side. Once a bodyguard, always a bodyguard I guess.

While I was "sleeping," those two became pretty good friends. She told me about how he would always talk to me. He'd keep me updated on how the crew was doing. Who was getting better, who was getting worse, and who didn't make it. When she asked him why, he said "Shepard invested a lot of herself in us. We're like her family. She'd want to know how we were doing." He was right.

Mom even said she caught him reading to me once. The book was Lena by Jacqueline Woodson. I remember mentioning to him once during those many months spent in the Detention Center, that Lena was the first book my father read to me. Before he died, whenever I was sick or sad he would pull it off the bookshelf and read it to me. It quickly became one of my favorite books. After my father's death, I'd always pull it out whenever I wanted to feel close to him again. I'm surprised he remembered.

I asked her why he wasn't there when I woke up. She explained that he had quite a few injuries himself. Not as bad as mine, but his did require some physical therapy. He put it off for the longest time because he didn't want to leave me alone. He wanted to make sure a familiar face was there when I woke up. My mom immediately stepped up and said she would be there whenever he couldn't be. Of course, a mere 30 minutes after he leaves for physical therapy, I decide to wake up. I really do have the worst timing.

We had been talking for about an hour when she tells me that he should be getting back soon. She asked me if I was up for one more visitor. I was tired, but I had to see him. I had to tell him the one thing I had been holding back for so long. I had a second chance to tell James Vega just how much he meant to me and I wasn't going to miss it.


	2. Chapter 2

I am such a chicken shit. No, really. I am. I can track down a rogue Spectre, take down a Reaper, take out the Collectors, and save the damn galaxy, but when it comes to feelings and romance I am a complete and utter chicken shit.

Right after my mother asked me if I wanted another visitor, he walked right through the door. He walked with a bit of a limp that favored his left side and he looked exhausted. Four months of relative inactivity also meant that he lost a bit of his previous bulk, but for the most part he remained relatively unchanged. His trademark tattoos were still in place and so was the mohawk that I loved so much.

He was looking down at the floor when he came in, so he didn't immediately see me sitting up in the bed. It wasn't until he got to the empty chair on the left side of my bed that he looked up and saw me. I could tell by the shocked look on his face that no one told him I was awake.

"Shepard," he started, his voice barely above a whisper "you're awake."

"Yeah. I am."

Everything I wanted to say, everything I had planned on telling him went out the window. My mind just went blank. All I could do was stare at him. My mother broke us from our trance by announcing that she was going to go order lunch for us. The smug smile that graced her face as she left let me know that she had no intentions on coming back that day. Thanks mom.

After she left, the silence became stifling. It was obvious that we both had so much to say, but we just didn't know where or how to start.

"How long have you been awake?" he asked me, breaking the suffocating silence.

I sighed, glad to have something to talk about, somewhere to start. I told him, "A little over an hour I think. Mom said you left about 30 minutes before I woke up."

"What else did you talk about?"

I knew where the conversation was heading, and I was glad he was the one directing it. I'm completely useless when it comes to things like this, as made obvious by my inability to do anything but stare at him when he walked in the door. I talked the Quarians and Geth into living together peacefully, but I get tongue tied and speechless in the presence of this one man. What the hell is wrong with me?

"She told me what you did. How you refused to give up on me. How you sat by me, everyday, for four months. How you talked to me. How you read to me." I looked up from the spot I had been staring at on the wall to look him in his eyes.

"You remembered," I said. I didn't know if it was a statement or a question, but he answered me anyway.

"Yes I did. I remember a lot of things about you Andrea." That was the first time I had ever heard him say my first name. Very few people know it and even fewer use it.

"I remember your favorite color is red and your favorite type of novel is a mystery. I remember your favorite hobby, besides shoe shopping, is building models of the ships you've lived and served on. I remember that, when you're planetside, your favorite place to be is the beach. Your parents took you there on your first family vacation and you've loved it ever since. I also remember that you actually can dance. The only reason people think you can't is because whenever you went into the clubs with your crew on shore leave, you'd dance like a complete fool to break the ice and make sure everyone got at least one good laugh, even if that laugh had to be at your expense."

For the second time that day, I was speechless. It took a minute, but I was able to finally organize my thoughts and say "I see you've been paying attention."

He simply gave a small, tired smile in response. We fall back into silence for a while, but this time it's a companionable one. About five minutes later, the doctor came back in to let us know that visiting hours were over. She insisted that, even though I had been in bed for four months, I needed my rest.

As James started to leave, he stopped halfway between the door and my bed. He turned back around and came to stand at my bedside again.

"I thought you might like these back."

He reached into the collar of his shirt and pulled out two sets of chains. He pulled one of them over his head and handed it to me. I looked down at the chain in my hand and realized that hanging from it was a set of dog tags. They were my dog tags.

As he walked out the door, all I could do was whisper the words "Thank you."


	3. Chapter 3

He had my dog tags. The whole time I was lying in that hospital bed, he had them. Not only did he keep the dog tags, he wore them. He could have simply given them to my mother or even put them in the drawer beside my bed. Instead he chose to wear them around his neck, everyday for four months.

That simple action made my head spin. I didn't realize I was crying until I felt the tears on my hand. I heard my mother talking to someone outside my door, so I quickly moved to brush away the few tears that I shed and put the dog tags around my neck. Judging by the look she gave me, I was sure she waited until James left before she came back. She was accompanied by yet another familiar face, Dr. Karin Chakwas.

"Dr. Chakwas! I wasn't expecting to see you so soon. What are you doing here?"

"I convinced your previous doctor to let me take over your primary care. I am more familiar with your past medical history and Cerberus upgrades than any of the doctors here." Karin said as she took a seat in the empty chair on the left side of my bed. She was right, as usual. One thing she forgot to mention is she's just about the only doctor I'll actually listen to.

"Well Doc, you were with me before this mess even started so it only makes sense to have you here with me at the end." It really was good to see her again. After a short examination, Dr. Chakwas informed me that the extra hardware Cerberus put into me was doing its job. A good majority of the injuries I had were three-quarters of the way, if not completely healed. I would still require some therapy to get myself back into working order. Once I got the basics of walking and eating solid foods down, I could then get myself back into shape and (hopefully) back to work.

Once she left, it was just me and my mother. She brought my lunch in with her which was I very grateful for. Since the doctors didn't want me eating anything that required too much chewing, all I got was some mashed potatoes, bananas, and a popsicle for desert. Delicious, I know.

While I ate, my mother grabbed the remote off my bedside table and turned on the tv that hung on the wall opposite my bed. The sun was beginning to set and it caused a glare that was giving me a slight headache. My mom saw me squinting, so she went over to the large picture window to my right to close the blinds. She sat down on the couch in front of the window and turned up the volume on the tv.

Somehow Alliance News Network caught wind that I was awake. This was particularly embarrassing for them since they were the ones attempting to spread the rumor that I was permanently brain damaged and never going to wake up. It seems like ever since the end of the war, ANN did nothing but go downhill. I didn't think it was even possible for them to get any worse.

After about ten more minutes of listening to the rumors and innuendo that they considered "news," my mother turned down the volume and shifted to face me.

"So, how did it go?" she asked me. There was no need to clarify as I knew exactly what she was referring to. The problem was, I hadn't had much time to digest exactly what happened.

"I don't know. Good I guess." was the only answer I could come up with.

"I see you got your dog tags back." she said while gesturing to the tags that now hung around my neck. I looked down at them and began to play with the chain. The silver of the chain shone brightly against my dark brown skin.

"Yeah. James gave them back to me. Why did he have them though? Where did he get them? Why didn't he give them to you? Why did he keep them?" The questions rushed out of me before I could stop them. I looked up at my mother, hoping that she could make some sense out of the situation I found myself in. She looked back at me, her dark brown eyes full of sympathy and sorrow. She ran a hand through her short, naturally curly black hair and took a deep breath.

"I can't tell you why he kept them, that's something only he can answer for you. What I can tell you is how he got them." I laid back against the headboard of my bed and waited for my mother to begin. She turned off the television and placed the remote on the table to her left.

"After the Reapers were destroyed, it didn't take long to clean up the Husks and other enemies that were left. The Normandy's ground team quickly regrouped and decided that the easiest way to find you would be to split up into groups. Since Liara, Garrus, and James were the least injured, they were ones who lead the teams who went into the Citadel to find you. James got to you first." She paused and looked away from me. She kept her eyes trained on the floor for a full minute before she began again.

"He told us that he never would've seen you if it wasn't for the trail of blood you left on the ground. The blood led to a pile of rubble, and sticking out between some beams was a pair of N7 dog tags. He immediately recognized them as yours. James and his team began to clear away the rubble to get to you. When they got to you, James carried you all the way back to the Normandy. He stayed with you in the Med Bay, and when you landed he carried you to this hospital. While they were prepping you for the operating room, a doctor went to remove your dog tags but James stopped him. He took the dog tags off himself and then walked out the door. I didn't know he kept them until you told me."

When she finished, the only thing I could do was stare at the ceiling. Instead of clarifying things, her story just made things a hell of a lot more complicated. Part of me wanted to believe that he did all of that because he cared for me. That he really, truly cared for me in the same way I cared for him. Another part of me, the more cynical part, believed that he was simply doing his job. For six months he was my warden, my bodyguard, my protector. It could be that he simply fell back into that role. I didn't know what to think at that point.

"You need your rest Andrea." My mother's statement broke me from the steadily declining train of thought I was on. She got up from the couch and gave me a kiss on the forehead like she used to do when I was little.

"I'll be back to check on you tomorrow. Try to get some sleep."

"I will. Goodnight mom."

"Goodnight honey."

When the click of the closing door signaled that my mother had indeed left, I slid down in the bed, laid on my back and stared up at the ceiling. The coolness that came from the metal of my dog tags felt like a ten ton weight on my chest. Why couldn't things like that ever be simple? Why did they always have to be so complicated, so confusing, so... scary? I needed to talk to him, to clear all of this up. I knew it was the only way I would ever be able to find peace. As I rolled over on my side to sleep, I made a promise to myself that I would stop being such a chicken shit and I would tell him how I felt.


	4. Chapter 4

_Light flashes.No gravity._   
_It's dark. So dark._   
_A small hiss._   
_No air._   
_Lungs burn._   
_Falling fast._   
_No light. No air._

_The flash of metal._   
_First silver, now red._   
_Blood drips._   
_Thane falls._   
_A prayer is said._   
_He's gone._

_The building shakes._   
_Walls crumble._   
_It's going to blow._   
_Mordin walks to the elevator._   
_"Someone else might've gotten it wrong"_   
_An explosion._   
_He's gone._

_Blood everywhere._   
_Explosions. Fire. Gunshots. Screaming._   
_We run._   
_The beam is just ahead._   
_No sound._   
_Harbinger lands._   
_He's ahead of me._   
_Red light. It's charging._   
_I try to warn Him._   
_There's no sound._   
_A flash._   
_It fires._   
_The beam rips through Him._   
_He's gone..._

_A scream pierces the air._   
_It's loud. So loud._   
_It won't stop._   
_Where is it coming from?_   
_So loud._   
_It just gets louder._   
_My ears ache._   
_My throat burns._   
_Why won't the screaming stop?_

"SHEPARD! WAKE UP!" My eyes snapped open. I was covered in sweat, limbs tangled in the bed sheets. James stood above me, his hands on my shoulders trying to restrain me. I must've been trying to run because I was sitting up in the the bed, my legs over the edge, and my hands balled into fists. My nails dug into my palms so hard that they drew blood.

"Look at me Lola. Focus on me and take a deep breath." He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. I concentrated on his words and tried to slow my breathing. It was a dream. It was all a dream. He's here. He's safe. He's ok. My body flooded with relief and I reached up to return the hug. After an all too brief moment, Dr. Chakwas rushed into the room.

"Shepard, what happened? Are you ok?" She asked me. I pulled back from the hug and turned to look at her.

"I'm ok. Just a bad dream. I'll be fine." My voice came out hoarse and rough. It was at that moment I realized that the scream I heard in my dream must have come from me. Karin met my eyes, entirely unconvinced that I was really ok.

"Well, since I'm here I might as well get your morning examination done." I silently thanked her for not pressing the issue. I swung my feet back up on the bed and laid back against the pillows. I grabbed James' hand and held onto it the entire time Dr. Chakwas worked. His silent presence was very comforting to me. The firm pressure of his hand in mine kept me grounded. I think he knew just how much of a comfort he was because he never moved and never made a sound. He just stood there, slowly caressing the back of my hand with his thumb, silently keeping watch while Dr. Chakwas checked my vital signs and took blood samples for testing.

"Everything looks good so far Commander. If you're up to it, I'd like to see you stretch your legs a bit. I know being cooped up in this room must be driving you a bit stir-crazy." Karin said with a slight smile.

"You know me so well." I replied, grateful for the change in mood. "Is there a park or something around here? I really need to some fresh air."

"There's a small courtyard a floor above us." James said. "My physical therapist took me up there yesterday. It's quiet and secluded. It'll give you some privacy, if you need it."

"That sounds nice. Can you take me?"

"Yeah." He gave my hand a reassuring squeeze and let go. "That may have to wait a bit though. I'm pretty sure you don't wanna get caught walking around the hallways in nothing but a hospital gown. Although, I might enjoy the view if you did." He said with one of his trademark grins. Happy to have a lighter mood, I offered him a smile of my own.

"Not even in your dreams honey." I replied with a slight laugh.

"Now there's the Lola I know and love." I felt myself begin to blush and silently hoped that my dark brown complexion would hide it from James. One look into his eyes told me that wasn't the case. Even if he couldn't see it, the smirk he gave me proved that he knew he had gotten under my skin.

"While I would hate to break up the wonderful thing you two have going, I would like to add that in addition to proper clothing, Shepard needs to eat before I'll let her go anywhere." At the sound of Karin's voice, James began to blush with me. It seems we had both forgotten she was even in the room.

James cleared his throat and said, "I'm gonna head back to my room now. You're not the only one who's not ready to be seen in public."

"Oh, I don't know. I kinda like the baggy pajama look on you." I just couldn't resist getting in one last jab. To be fair, what I said wasn't far from the truth. He wore a pair of baggy grey sweatpants that rode low on his hips and a tight white tank top. His trademark tattoos were on full display as were a few new scars that I made a mental note to ask about later.

"See something you like?" My eyes snapped back to his and I realized I had probably been staring at him a little longer than I intended. He smiled, shook his head, and said "I'll see you later Lola."

"Uh, yeah. I'll see you in a bit." I tried not to, I really did, but I couldn't help but watch him as he walked out the door. A small cough off to my right let me know that, once again, I had forgotten that Dr. Chakwas was in the room. "Shut up Karin," I said as I turned my head to look at her.

"What? I was just going to inform you that I was leaving to get started on your blood tests. If you let me know what you want I can also have breakfast brought up to you." The smug smile she had plastered on her face told me that she hadn't intended on saying any of that. I simply smiled and ordered my food.

After she had gone, I was left alone with my thoughts. Aside from the horrific dream, the day was shaping up to be a good one. I had managed to not make a complete ass out of myself in front of James. That in itself was a major accomplishment. I was also glad that we had settled back into our flirtatious banter, but it wasn't like it was before. There was something deeper to this, something I couldn't quite put into words. Whatever it was, I knew that I wanted it. I only hoped that James did too.


	5. Chapter 5

After a decent breakfast that consisted of a fruit salad, oatmeal, and a glass of water, I slowly made my way to the shower. The short walk from my bedside to the bathroom turned out to be one of the more challenging parts of the day. Even though the injuries to my legs had fully healed two weeks previous, I still had to get them used to walking again. Dr. Chakwas insisted that I should, at the very least, use a cane to get around. Being the stubborn person that I am, I had to respectfully disagree. There would be plenty of time to use a cane after I was dead... Again. My stubbornness came with a price though. While I could stand up on my own and I could take a few steps, I couldn't do so for very long. That meant that what should have been a short trip from the bed to the bathroom took about three minutes.

When I finally got to the bathroom, I was relieved to see that the shower had a removable shower head, a small seat, and hand rails. After adjusting the controls to get the water comfortably warm, I removed the hospital gown and relaxed under the spray of the water. After a few minutes of letting the shower wash away some of my pain and tension, I reached over to grab some soap. I was pleasantly surprised to see that someone had managed to find my favorite body wash. I guess being the "galaxy's savior" afforded you some small luxuries. The smell was a blend of plums and flower blossoms. Having that familiar scent surround me made the last bit of stress flow right down the drain. I was slowly beginning to feel like me again.

As I washed, I took note of all the new scars I had acquired. There was a three inch scar that ran vertically from my collarbone to my left breast and a five inch one that ran horizontally on the same side along my ribcage. I had an intricate network of them on both my right leg and arm that looked similar to a spider web. There were a few straight, small surgery scars on my left leg and two gunshot wounds that had formed dark brown keloids. While looking at my scars, I came to realize I really didn't mind them. Each one of them came with a story. Some of success and others of failure. Each one of them detailed a very personal part of my history. For the first time since my "reawakening," I truly began to feel like a human again instead of some mindless war machine.

After what felt like about an hour in the shower, I figured it was time to get out and get dressed before someone came looking for me. I turned off the water and stood to leave. I was pleasantly surprised by how much better my muscles felt. While I still had a slight limp and couldn't walk too fast, getting out of the shower and getting dressed was much easier than getting in. I began to put on the outfit that was left on the counter for me. It was a simple gray t-shirt, a pair of dark blue jeans, and my favorite pair of black combat boots. After a quick brush of my teeth and hair, I finally felt like I was decent enough to be seen in public.

I opened the bathroom door and saw James sitting on the couch by the window on the far side of the room. He seemed to be lost in thought, typing something on his Omnitool. I cleared my throat and he looked up and smiled at me. "Lookin' good Lola. You ready to go?" He stood up, raised his arms above his head to stretch, and then started to walk towards me. If I thought he looked good in a tank top and sweatpants, I'd need a stronger word to describe how he looked now. He had on an Alliance t-shirt that did nothing to hide the muscles that lay beneath and the jeans he wore accentuated his ass perfectly. His hair was slightly wet, so I knew he probably just got out of the shower himself.

"You're not looking too bad yourself." I said with a smile. "Let's get out of here." I turned to leave, but he reached out and lightly grabbed my elbow. I turned to look at him and my breath caught in my chest for a moment. I hadn't realized just how close we were until that moment. My senses were slightly overloaded by his powerful presence. His earthy and clean scent, the tattoo that peaked out from under his shirt, his light brown skin, the scar that ran from his bottom lip to his chin, the stubble that ran along his jaw, his beautiful and expressive hazel eyes. It was almost too much to take. It took every bit of restraint I had to keep myself from closing the small gap between us and kissing him.

"I think you're forgetting something," he said while his eyes bored into mine.

"What would that be?"

"This." Out of the corner of my eye I saw something flash. I reluctantly took my eyes off his and saw that in his right hand he was holding the cane that Dr. Chakwas had attempted to get me to use earlier. I released a bit of nervous laughter and shook my head a bit in an attempt to clear it.

"You can kiss my ass if you think I'm using that thing." I said as I took a step back and looked back up at him.

"I figured you wouldn't but I promised Dr. Chakwas I'd try," he said with a smirk. "You sure you're gonna be ok though?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine," I replied. "I have a big, strong man looking after me. If I pass out, I give you permission to carry me back here." He simply laughed and shook his head. "Now less talking and more walking. I wanna get the hell out of this room before Karin changes her mind."


	6. Chapter 6

The elevator ride up to the floor above was a short and quiet one. It did, however, give me time enough to do a bit of thinking. While I had told myself that I was going to tell James how I felt, I realized that I had no idea just how I would do it. It's not like I could say "Oh wow, it's so pretty up here, and by the way I think I may be falling in love with you." No, that definitely wouldn't go over well. I was so wrapped up in thinking about how I was going to pull this off that I didn't notice that the elevator had stopped. I was snapped out of my trance-like state by a soft shake of my shoulder.

"You still in there Lola?" His voice was light but his eyes showed the worry that I know he felt.

"Yeah, I'm ok. Just thinking." I could tell he wasn't entirely convinced, but he let the subject drop for now. "Now, where is this courtyard you've told me so much about?"

The walk from the elevator to the courtyard was a slow one, mostly due to me. The slower pace allowed me to do something I hadn't done in a very long time. I took the time to enjoy both my surroundings and my company. While James and I talked, I found out that the "hospital" we were currently in was actually a converted apartment/office building. Soon after the Reapers landed, many of the hospitals in the city either became quickly overloaded or were destroyed. This building was undergoing the final stages of construction and the decision was quickly made to retrofit it into a makeshift hospital. It was far enough outside of city limits that the Reapers didn't target it and was big enough to hold many patients. Some clues to its original purpose still remained if you looked hard enough. The courtyard we were headed to was one of them. It was located on the top floor of the building. The hallways had massive windows on the outer walls and skylights that let in plenty of natural light.

When we stepped through the doors leading to the courtyard the first thing I noticed was how open it felt. The hallways formed a large square that enclosed the sides of the courtyard, but the absence of a roof made it feel like you were standing out in the open. A light breeze passed through the manicured bushes and over my skin. I'd almost forgotten how good it felt to be outside in the fresh air without having to worry about someone shooting at me. It also struck me how safe I felt standing in what could be considered a very vulnerable position. I had no armor, no sidearm, and I was in no shape to take anyone down in hand to hand combat, but I felt completely safe. With anyone else I might still be on guard, but with James I finally felt like I could completely relax.

I took a deep breath and headed towards the bench directly across from me with James following close behind. We both sat down on the bench, James stretching his legs out in front of him and I leaned back and looked up at the sky above me. The sky was a beautiful shade of blue with a few thin white clouds scattered across it. The faint sound of demolition and construction could be heard in the distance. If you blocked it out, you could almost imagine that none of it, the Reaper invasion, Cerberus, the Collectors, had ever happened. After a few minutes, I felt a hand brush across my forearm, fingers intertwining with my own.

"Are you gonna tell me what's on your mind?" His voice was so soft I almost didn't catch what he said. I looked down at our hands, my dark brown contrasted against his much lighter shade, and slowly began to run my thumb along his skin. I took a deep breath and just let the words come.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For everything. You've done more for me than you know. Shit, you've probably done more for me than even I know. You were there for me when no one else was. You didn't have to accept Anderson's offer, you could've left if you really wanted to. We both know that. You didn't leave though. You stayed with me during the trial, came in on your days off to keep me company, shit you even gave me a Christmas present." I stopped and looked into his eyes. "I still have that card, you know. It's in my cabin on the Normandy."

"I know. It's kind of odd to have a card in a picture frame, don't you think?" He said with a small smile. I laughed and tilted my head back to look at the sky again.

"Yeah, well I had to replace what was there."

"What was there?"

"Kaidan's picture." The words came out barely above a whisper. I closed my eyes and bit my lip. It still hurt to think about what we had and lost. While things were better between us now, they would never be the same. The friendship and trust we had was long gone. James gave my hand a reassuring squeeze and that gave me the strength to go on. "When they took my rank and ship, you were there. You were there while I raged and cried. Whenever I needed someone to talk to, you were there. When I just didn't want to be alone, you were there. Fuck, it feels like you know me better than I know myself sometimes.

"The whole fucking galaxy was looking to me to magically make everything better and at times I felt like I couldn't fucking take it anymore. That's just too much pressure to put on one person. When I got the Normandy back, I was surrounded by people but I had never felt more alone. All those people saw in me were my titles and achievements. The Commander Shepard, 'Hero of Elysium,' 'First Human Spectre,' 'Savior of the Citadel,' 'Cerberus terrorist,' 'Alliance traitor,' 'killed the Collectors,' or in the case of the Batarians 'Murderer.' I was all of these things, but I wasn't me. I wasn't Andrea, the girl who loves to read and build model ships. The woman who has a weird obsession with shoes and loves to sing like an idiot in the shower. No one saw me for me, except for you. You were, no fuck that, you are the only one who sees past all of the awards and achievements and knows who I am. Even Kaidan, a man who said he loved me and who I thought I loved in return, never took the time to find out about me and what made me tick." I turned slightly so I was facing James, his hand never leaving mine, and looked directly into his eyes. "So, thank you. There's no way in hell I would've been able to do half of what I did on this last run, much less come out of this shit alive if I didn't have you by my side." I was stopped short by the feel of his free hand lightly brushing against my chin and my cheek. His fingers slowly intertwined themselves in my hair. I closed my eyes and sighed at the contact. It felt so good to have him that close. One of his fingers lightly traced the biotic amp at the base of my skull. My back arched and I couldn't mask the small moan that left my lips. It was too much and nowhere near enough all at once. I heard his body shift and felt his breath caress the skin just beneath my ear.

"Just what exactly are you trying to tell me Lola?" His lips hovered centimeters above my neck. So close and yet so agonizingly far away. His fingers continued to caress the spot around my amp while he waited for my answer.

"I love you." The words left my mouth before I had time to think about it. My eyes snapped open and James lifted his head to look at me. His eyes, those beautiful hazel eyes, were cycling through a mix of emotions that I did not have the mental capacity to decipher at the time. I opened my mouth to say something, anything, but before I could get a word out his lips were on mine. Before I had time to completely register what happened, he pulled back. In that moment, it felt as if something in my chest broke free.

I quickly reached up, one hand on either side of his face, and pulled him back in for another kiss. His right hand came to rest on my waist while the fingers on his left resumed the lazy circles they were making at the base of my skull. My hands roamed across his head, fingernails lightly scraping downwards across the sensitive skin on his throat, across his collarbone, and came to rest on his chest. His tongue brushed against my lip and I moaned at the contact and deepened the kiss. In that moment, nothing in the world existed but us. My teeth lightly grazed against his bottom lip and I very reluctantly pulled back. The kiss had left both of us completely breathless.

"I love you too," James said quietly. "Mierda, it feels good to finally say that out loud. Te quiero Andrea." As we were leaning in for another kiss, his Omnitool beeped. Everything up until that point was quiet so the ping from the Omnitool was loud enough to make both of us jump. We looked at each other for a second and began to laugh. We both resumed the positions we had when we first sat down. While he read over and replied to the message he received, I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face. For the first time in a very long time I felt like things were finally looking up.

"That was Dr. Chakwas. She said it's time for you to go back downstairs. You have medicine to take and lunch to eat." James stood, stretched, and then offered his hand to help me get up. When I was up on my two feet, he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me in close. His breath danced across my ear as he whispered, "How serious are you about this? About us?"

"Very. I have no plans on letting you go now that I have you." I replied, sounding slightly breathless.

He pulled me in for an all too brief kiss. When he pulled back, he gave me one of his most breathtaking smiles. "Good. I don't plan on going anywhere. Now lets get you back to your room before the Doc comes and drags you down there herself." I put my hand into his and we began our slow walk back down to my room.


End file.
